Many months ago, i had an encounter which kept me a distant from this patient. Her strong remark kept me at bay, a 10' pole distance. Last week i gave a ride to 2 of my co volunteers after our day care day, and the topic in the car was about "Mdm Bling Bling". She loves and is constantly adorned with bling bling be it a brooch, necklace or rings... The conversation was toned negatively and in defense i said..........."Oh i had a taste of her moons ago, and ever since kept my distance". There was also talk about why she was allowed to come to Day Care if she had such a demanding attitude. Simply said, it was just negatively toned chat in my car..
That very evening, i realised that when i "gang up" with the rest who felt the same resistance towards her, how am i different from them who do not know Christ. One of my devotion mornings, Matthew 5:44, 46-48 jumped on me. i realised that i would not be reflecting Christ's love if i practised the herd mentality and keep away from her, how could i reflect Christ. It is so true that it is easy to love those who are lovable or whom you like, but what about the others? Today, 1st October, i made a real attempt to be nice towards her. It started as she walked in the Day Care and noticing she dressed a little special with the baju kurung or kebaya, i let out a WOW. Later that day, as the 2 of us volunteers chatted and i polished her nails and other patients, it was so LIBERATING to suppress my own feelings and ACTIVELY make an effort to be nice towards her. I shifted my focus to actually being nice rather than being irritated. .......!
The pain of the RM320 was real and at a time when the business was slow and bank account low too. I consciously am now ensuring i use the paid for internet more than my mobile when there is no urgency. Yes, in a way i am asking God why such timing for me to experience a cracked back wind screen....However, when i got back in the afternoon, Dr Tuen was waiting to give me a present, a cute little bag and RM100 for the showing of property during her vacation...Oh Thank you God for this type of unexpected gift. Indeed God life is not a bed of roses, and perhaps it is. With roses comes the thorns in life as well. As i read, learnt and hopefully remember this....In life, we must be aware of the thorns, but focus on the roses and it's beauty........In my case, the maturity and metamorphosis i am experiencing when i put others and not my own feelings. The joy i carry that really allows me to be a beacon of light for Christ....God let me shine, and shine always for your glory.. Thank you for working in me and then through me. Thank you for the liberating feeling as i am released and enjoy the sweetness in life... Thank you Lord indeed, and thank you Lord for the weather and letting my laundry dry in this wet spell!!! You are so good, i love you Lord.......
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